The Validation Challenge

In relationships or marriage it's especially hard to validate or acknowledge our partner's point of view when it pushes our buttons.
As difficult as they are, these tough moments are times when we can grow the most as individuals.
The hardest part is holding on to our selves, which takes confidence and calm.
Positive self-talk and noticing, or following our breathing can help. 
From a place of balance and security, we can send a message to our partner that we believe they have a right to their point of view and its associated thoughts and feelings.

Relationship Troubles?

If you're feeling overwhelmed and powerless, first attend to regaining your balance by putting your own house in order.

Reconnect with supportive friends.
Optimize your nutritional and fitness routines.
Revisit your personal short and long-term career goals.
Reconnect with your spiritual base.

Journaling your way through this process will help to make it solid and enduring.

Now you're ready to assess and address your marriage or relationship troubles from a position of greater balance and confidence.

For questions about couples therapy or marriage counseling check out my website: www.resolutioncounseling.com

Lower Your Walls

Our defensive walls might keep us safe and they make sense in light of our experience, but they will also keep our partner at a distance.
You can trade your walls for permeable boundaries that are based on current data, by letting the past be past and giving some benefit of the doubt. (Still, watch for red flags that suggest potential problems and don't ignore your intuition.)
If this is difficult counseling would be a good idea. The effects of old hurts or trauma doesn't always go away with the simple passage of time.

For questions about couples therapy visit my website: www.resoutioncounseling.com

Marriage Counseling

I derive a great sense of purpose and satisfaction from being invited into people's lives to help them build relationships rich in trust and intimacy.

By combining my 15 years of counseling experience with a comprehensive therapeutic approach designed to match individual styles and needs, I work to make lasting change.

My counseling and therapy services include:

A proactive approach to couples and marriage counseling.
Help rebuilding trust after an affair or infidelity.
Effective recovery counseling for compulsive sexual behaviors.
Skills to improve anger management.

www.resolutioncounseling.com

Differing Views

It's a given that two people with separate brains, different backgrounds and histories are often going to see the details of life differently.
It's tempting to get all caught up in whose version of reality is more correct, but when we succumb to this we're choosing to put being right over the the quality of our relationship intimacy.

For marriage and couples counseling visit my site @ www.resolutioncounseling.com

In a New Relationship

At the beginning, we're on our best behavior, not unlike going on a job interview. We pull on past experience and give our partner what we think it'll take to seal the deal. 
Both parties are usually under the effect of a brew of powerful neuro-chemicals that affects judgment, reduces inhibition, as it produces a high that can't be beat:-)
Even if it's all good, don't go rushing off to the altar or the mortgage broker, because you're really making decisions of a lifetime.
Spoken, or not, you're entering into a relational contract that binds. It contains financial, division of labor, and sexual terms, to name a few.
To have a few meetings on these topics isn't very romantic, but good common sense as you form this important partnership. The fever of new love will pass and while your love may very well become deeper and enduring, these contractual elements will remain in play.

For answers to your marriage and couple counseling questions visit my website: www.resolutioncounseling.com

High Conflict Couples in Counseling

Couples counseling further aggravates the problems of the high conflict couple and is contraindicated.
These couples are highly reactive and codependent and need to turn their focus away from each other and toward themselves, if they truly want to create lasting change.
The necessary individual work is a huge challenge, demanding a tireless effort for them to own their respective reactivity and emotional life.